A somewhat disturbing sign of spring: The Brewers’ sausage mascots have been tranquilized, wrapped in plastic and packed on trucks for transport to the team’s spring training facility in Phoenix.
Suffocated sausages? pic.twitter.com/yggopCYOSB
— Adam McCalvy (@AdamMcCalvy) February 5, 2014
Disturbing as this image may be, at least it’s not like the old days when they used to freeze them. That was truly horrifying.
You’re may be wondering why it’s necessary to freeze or tranquilize the sausages at all. You’ve obviously never traveled hundreds of miles in a car with a sausage before.
Trust me, you don’t want a car sick sausage on your hands. Those things are nasty enough when they’re feeling good.
Hard to blame them for being in a bad mood. They spend most of their lives locked up in a little dark room, only being allowed out once a day to race around a track for the amusement of drunk baseball fans.
You’d probably be ticked off too if that was your life.
And they get to spend the next couple months in Phoenix. Imagine being a sausage in that Arizona sunshine. Just a nightmare.
I can’t believe PETA doesn’t do something. Does PETA cover sausages? Or do they only care about pre-processed animal matter?