Fresno Grizzlies will sport Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles jerseys

Sept 2, 2012; Miami, FL, USA; The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles gestures during a game between the New York Mets and the Miami Marlins at Marlins Park. Mandatory Credit: Steve Mitchell-USA TODAY Sports

Never in human history has a minor league baseball team taken the field in jerseys inspired by the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. But the Fresno Grizzlies will change all that.

This year, the Grizzlies will sport these unis inspired by the ’80s/’90s pop culture phenomenon that combined adolescence, genetic malformation, ancient Japanese warriors renowned for their stealth and shelled amphibians renowned for getting run over while trying in vain to cross the highway.

Oh.

Here is where I admit that I never really got the appeal of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Was it just the weird randomness of that combination of things? Was that what people found amusing?

Was it that they were all named after famous painters?

Or was everyone just really high at the time?

Stoners seem to enjoy TMNT. And Michael Bay is bringing them back to the big screen.

If it was a popular toy in the ’80s, Michael Bay will be bringing it to the big screen. Rainbow Brite the movie directed by Michael Bay?

Oh yeah, bank on it. It’s happening.

BTW, Rainbow Brite uniforms on baseball players would be ten kinds of awesome. TMNT? I’m ambivalent.

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