MLB: Five Toughest Player Names To Spell
The annual Scripps National Spelling Bee once again proved to be must-watch TV this past Thursday. After a quick poll of Call To The Pen writers, we give you some of the most difficult player names in the history of baseball to spell correctly.
If you’re like Cleveland Indians’ shortstop Francisco Lindor, you spent Thursday night not watching game six of the the NBA’s Golden State Warriors-Oklahoma City Thunder Western Conference Finals, but rather glued to two teenagers duking it out in one of the most epic Scripps National Spelling Bees in history. Through 25 championship rounds, Nihar and Jairam captivated America and proved that just because you can spell, doesn’t mean you can land a high five.
That got all of us writer types here at Call To The Pen thinking about our baseball card-memorizing, ballgame-attending, FanGraphs-scanning pasts, and wondering which players in the game’s history would’ve had a chance at stumping the finalists on the dais.
Baseball has had its fair share of memorable names. For every Babe Ruth, Willie Mays, and Barry Bonds that only takes a few letters to spell, there are those that prove much trickier.
Nihar and Jairam finished in a tie and proved themselves champions of vocabulary. Is your knowledge of baseball history on par with what those kids can do with a dictionary? Let us know in the comments if you could have spelled these tongue-twisting names from the national pastime.
Before we get started, it should be noted that the following players earned honorable mention: Yoenis Cespedes, Arquimedes Caminero, Mark Grudzielanek, Joaquin Andujar, Louis Sockalexis, Zoilo Versalles, Red Schoendienst, and George “Snuffy” Steinweiss. Doug Mientkiewicz was also left out because the author still can’t spell his name.
Next: Who cracked the top 5?
Marc Rzepczynski
Perhaps the most compelling thing about Rzepczynski is his name. The guy who fans and teammates alike have taken to calling “Scrabble” because of the impossibility of actually pronouncing his name correctly, let alone spelling it, has put together just 2.2 bWAR in eight major league seasons.
A career situational left-handed reliever with a 3.95 ERA, 3.78 FIP, and just over a 2-to-1 strikeout-to-walk ratio, Rzepczynski began his career with the Toronto Blue Jays before moving on to the St. Louis Cardinals and then the Cleveland Indians. He was traded at the deadline a season ago from Cleveland to San Diego, and is now with the Oakland Athletics, appearing in 23 games with a 3.78 ERA and 0.2 bWAR through Friday night’s games..
Rzepczynski’s name has a silent “R” at the beginning and a random “Z” in middle to throw you off. Would you want to try to write that name on your checks everyday? There’s a good possibility that even Rzepczynski has to double-check the spelling every once in awhile.
Next: Getting salty?
Jarrod Saltalamacchia
The 36th overall pick in the 2003 MLB draft is now on his sixth team, but you’d have a better chance of memorizing his career arc than how to spell his name. A free agent at the end of 2016, Saltalamacchia is fighting for his big league life in his first year with Detroit, and it’s not going that well.
After three seasons in Boston and one in Miami between 2011 and 2014 in which he caught over 100 games and put together a combined 5.4 bWAR, Saltalamacchia is slashing .198/.284/.495 for the Tigers while getting the lion’s share of the games behind the dish. The high point in the West Palm Beach native’s career came in 2012 when he hit 25 home runs and drove in 59 for the Red Sox. He hasn’t approached those numbers since.
At this point, Saltalamacchia has proven a serviceable, though by no means spectacular catcher. While he won a World Series ring in Boston in 2013, his biggest claim to fame is the (unverified) title of most letters in a single battery that he and Justin Verlander jointly hold.
Next: Another spellcheck backstop.
A.J. Pierzynski
Most hated player in baseball by his peers in recent memory? Possibly. Most hated player in baseball by those trying to spell his name in recent memory? Definitely. Pierzynski has proven throughout his career to not only be a thorn in the side of opponents, but also by anyone who still keeps score by hand when they head to the ballpark.
Now in his 19th big league season at 39 years old, the former third round draft pick in 1994 is plying his trade behind the plate for the woeful Atlanta Braves, and the struggle has been real. After hitting .300 in 113 games in 2015, Pierzynski has seen his production drop to a .216/.250/.265 slash line this season for arguably the worst team in baseball. It’s a far cry from the guy who was a cornerstone of a World Champion Chicago White Sox club and who hit 27 longballs in 2012.
This may be the last season Pierzynski is strapping on the catcher’s gear, but his name is one to keep baseball fans guessing, mostly incorrectly, for years to come.
Next: Toughest name to spell in MLB history?