Houston Astros: Fans find creative holiday gifts for each other

Signed Baseball Bat

Imagine being able to swing with as much might as George Springer. Picture driving a home run from the eyes of 5-foot-6 Altuve.

Although not all of that is possible with a signed bat from the team, it can still be a dream come true. A handful of the team’s heroes signed it at some point, which is special. 

Several different bat colors were available apparently, as other people displayed their bats online, which were black and a different type of brown. But the original pine color looks the coolest – don’t @ me.

Much debate could be made about whether the players signed it or not. Technology can allow autographs to be mimicked entirely.

Thus, the originality of a baseball bat cannot be more authentic than catching players as they come onto the field before their games.

Nonetheless, the signatures surely are real, even if they weren’t acquired in real time. It’s not easy to obtain all of their signings in one day.

However, a bat with the signatures of all those players across time could also be something worth looking into.

Fans may argue that a ball is better suited for this type of gift. But then again, not every player could fit their entire name on a tiny ball. A bat allows this to be a possibility at least.

Of course, to complete the package, they could have added a ball to the mix as well.

Either way, the piece of lumber probably won’t be wielded by any baseball player anytime soon.

Actually, the lucky guy probably won’t ever use it.

Honorable Mention – Matryoshka Dolls

Baseball may be America’s pastime. But these Astros Matryoshka dolls should be a cultural phenomenon.

Any cosmopolite would agree that anyone can receive these dolls without any shame. Some may argue that they are even better than any of the other previous gifts.

More from Call to the Pen

• Philadelphia Phillies, ready for a stretch run, bomb St. Louis Cardinals
• Philadelphia Phillies: The 4 players on the franchise’s Mount Rushmore
• Boston Red Sox fans should be upset over Mookie Betts’ comment
• Analyzing the Boston Red Sox trade for Dave Henderson and Spike Owen
• 2023 MLB postseason likely to have a strange look without Yankees, Red Sox, Cardinals

What looks most impressive is the attention to detail. Their faces aren’t some photo-copied creation slapped onto a piece of porcelain.

Someone committed an immense amount of time crafting them, and with much skill.

One of the evident observations is that Altuve is the tallest of the three in the picture – irony at its finest.

The second baseman’s size doesn’t correlate with his talent on the field, as everyone knows by now. 

And Springer is arguably his second in command, based on the remarkable performance he put into each World Series matchup.

The outfielder is still young-ish, looking to become a multiple-time All-Star.

Then there’s the middle-field maestro in Correa, who has proved his ability at the plate is comparable to what he does in the field.

Many consider him a franchise player, but he’s already accustomed to being an Astros star.

Next: Houston Mount Rushmore

Each of the three means as much to the team as manager A.J. Hinch. And if this person ever makes a fourth doll, Hinch should be in consideration for it.

Happy Holidays!