MLB: LeBron James, five MLB pace of play fixes, fan votes, and more

CLEVELAND, OH - OCTOBER 15: (L-R) National Basketball Association Cleveland Cavaliers players Channing Frye, Kevin Love, LeBron James and Chris Andersen attend game two of the American League Championship Series between the Toronto Blue Jays and the Cleveland Indians at Progressive Field on October 15, 2016 in Cleveland, Ohio. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)
CLEVELAND, OH - OCTOBER 15: (L-R) National Basketball Association Cleveland Cavaliers players Channing Frye, Kevin Love, LeBron James and Chris Andersen attend game two of the American League Championship Series between the Toronto Blue Jays and the Cleveland Indians at Progressive Field on October 15, 2016 in Cleveland, Ohio. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)
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CLEVELAND, OH – OCTOBER 15: (L-R) National Basketball Association Cleveland Cavaliers players Channing Frye, Kevin Love, LeBron James and Chris Andersen attend game two of the American League Championship Series between the Toronto Blue Jays and the Cleveland Indians at Progressive Field on October 15, 2016 in Cleveland, Ohio. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)
CLEVELAND, OH – OCTOBER 15: (L-R) National Basketball Association Cleveland Cavaliers players Channing Frye, Kevin Love, LeBron James and Chris Andersen attend game two of the American League Championship Series between the Toronto Blue Jays and the Cleveland Indians at Progressive Field on October 15, 2016 in Cleveland, Ohio. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images) /

It’s perfectly obvious to every NBA fan that baseball has never been more boring and out of touch with the average sports fan. These five solutions would fix MLB, America’s pastime overnight.

It’s no secret, dear friends that Major League Baseball is in serious trouble. America’s pastime has faced its fair share of turmoil over the years. The 1994 strike that cost fans the World Series and the fallout of the Steroid Era. But nothing holds a candle to the current crisis. All one can do is thank their stars MLB commissioner Rob Manfred has made it his mission to fix this problem once and for all.

That problem, of course, is MLB pace of play.

I can hear the objections now. The beauty of baseball is that it’s a timeless game that connects us with our past. That there’s no clock- it can go on forever, which is a good thing — with all the numbers and stats telling a story worth discussing. There’s poetry to an epic twenty-pitch battle between batter and pitcher. It’s a chance to relax, to reflect. An opportunity to eat a hot dog and discuss the merits of the DH, not just watch the day’s action.

Save it. 

If you have time to watch a Major League Baseball game in 2018, it’s because you’re some loser who still uses the dial-up internet and a flip phone. Baseball has become hopelessly ponderous, painfully slow, and woefully out of touch with the average fan of sports in general. Things need to speed up. Pronto. 

Other sports are blowing by baseball in popularity. Did you know that more people watched cross-country skiing and curling last week than they did baseball? Think about it.

The other three Big Four leagues are leaving baseball in the dust as well. I mean, what league wouldn’t want to be as smoothly operated as the NFL?

Consequently, the game must speed up. The following are five solutions that would fix Major League Baseball overnight.

Everyone knows basketball and football are better than baseball. So why not let NBA and NFL stars hit? CLEVELAND, OH – OCTOBER 07: LeBron James
Everyone knows basketball and football are better than baseball. So why not let NBA and NFL stars hit? CLEVELAND, OH – OCTOBER 07: LeBron James /

MLB Solution # 1: Celebrity Pinch-Hitters 

Earlier this week, famed sports analyst Rich Eisen reported via Twitter that there’s some chatter among MLB officials to enact a rule allowing managers to bat whoever they want in the 9th inning. Meaning that regardless of where the Yankees are in the batting order, Aaron Judge and Giancarlo Stanton are getting their hacks. Sorry, Kimbrel.

However, that’s what I call half a good idea.

For some real next level thinking, managers should be able to let anyone in the building pinch hit. More specifically, I’m talking about celebrity athletes in attendance.

He is actually a Yankees prospect. (Photo by Otto Greule Jr/Getty Images)
He is actually a Yankees prospect. (Photo by Otto Greule Jr/Getty Images) /

Think about it. Major League Baseball is trying to chase down the NBA for market share. So imagine how great it would be for the game if every ninth inning at Progressive Field, LeBron James came to the plate. And when the action shifts to Houston, James Harden is on hand to save the day for the Astros.

Unless, of course, A.J. Hinch decides to go with J.J. Watt that day. Likewise, I’d expect Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski to get more Fenway at-bats than Kyrie Irving.

The rule would work like this. One batter, in the bottom of the 9th,  could be any athlete from any other local team perceived to be more exciting and profitable than baseball. Sidney Crosby. Ezekiel Elliot. Steph Curry. All would be options for their respective markets.

Tickets sold, soaring tv ratings….and zero chance of extra innings when they struck out after three pitches.

Win-win.

Nine innings in the books? Time to vote. (Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images)
Nine innings in the books? Time to vote. (Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images) /

MLB Solution # 2: Fans Pick the Winner 

We’ve all been there. After finally plodding through nine innings of back and forth baseball, the game still isn’t over. Extra innings time.

Once in a blue moon, a tenth inning is cute. But every single week, some game goes way longer, ruining the MLB average game time figure. Time to bring that to an end. Luckily, there’s a solution that is both practical AND interactive.

  • Let fans vote for the winner of the game.
  • I know, right? How has this not been a thing since Season 1 of American Idol?
  • The game is still tied after nine innings.
  • No more tedious continued play to reasonably determine a winner.

Fans of both teams just text in their choice for who should win, be it based on performance so far or just pure fan love.

The jumbotrons at the stadium could just show the Twitter feed where the votes would be tabulated. Votes would be tabulated over a single, long commercial break packed full of advertising revenue. Once the numbers are in, we have our winner. Easy peasy.

For most games, voting would be closed off to fans in attendance. But for nationally broadcast affairs, the whole world would get to join in the fun. A Red Sox-Yankees tilt might well break the Internet.

If a team can win in regulation, nothing changes. All power to them. If not though…power to the people.

MLB
MLB /

MLB Solution # 3: Two for One Homers 

If there’s one thing I can’t stand about Major League Baseball, it’s manufacturing runs. Watching guys move runners over or stretching singles into doubles. Bunting? Meh. Sacrifice flys? Gag me- it’s an out, and a slow, boring one at that.

All that is really worth watching in baseball is the home run.

Everyone digs the long ball. Statcast reports, obsession with barreled up balls and exit velocity, all serve as proof of this. So why not make the game’s most popular play the most valuable one?

To speed up the pace of play, home runs need to start counting for two points instead of one.

This solution checks all the boxes. For one, game scores would be higher across the board. That’s huge- the average sports fan of today hates defensive struggles, and that’s the target audience here. But it also helps to incentivize more aggressive swings. That means faster outs, and particularly, more strikeouts.

In conclusion, it translates to faster games. The odds of a game going to extra innings drop dramatically here. Batters are forced to swing for the fences more. The totals for home runs and strikeouts will go up across the league. Which means fans are seeing a lot more of the two most prominent reasons they tune in to baseball games, to begin with. All while spending less time watching.

Ain’t nobody got time for that. CHICAGO, IL – AUGUST 01: Dee Gordon
Ain’t nobody got time for that. CHICAGO, IL – AUGUST 01: Dee Gordon /

MLB Solution # 4: Eliminate Stolen Bases 

Alright, we’re making progress. Time to shave off some minutes though. If Major League Baseball is truly serious about improving pace of play, they need to scrap the stolen base.

Baseball blasphemy, you say? Well, simmer down old-timer.

Sure, it’s kind of exciting when the high play actually happens. Yet what this picture fails to capture are the ten throws to first base over the course of the inning that occurred before Dee Gordon finally took off.

Talk about a snooze fest.

Therefore, giving rid of this insanely antiquated practice would shorten game times dramatically. Pitchers throwing over to first would become an extreme rarity, almost to the point of being interesting to see. There’d be no point. Dee Gordon is still getting to second on most ground balls. Pablo Sandoval not so much.

Plus, think about all those players you see getting hurt sliding into second. Eliminating one more way players get injured keeps star players in the lineup. Secondly, this option also places less value on speedy players, and more on thumpers. Which if you recall solution three, translates to more outs and even faster games.

Seriously, how many pitches do you need to see? NEW YORK, NY – OCTOBER 17: Aaron Judge
Seriously, how many pitches do you need to see? NEW YORK, NY – OCTOBER 17: Aaron Judge /

MLB Solution # 5: Forget the Pitch Clock- Bring on the Pitch Count

If there’s one thing we can all agree on about Major League Baseball, it’s that there are too many pitches. The modern sports fan craves action, and there’s nothing exciting about throwing a ball. Probably the only thing less interesting than that is watching someone repeatedly just make contact with a ball, over and over again.

I mean, I’m never making solid contact with even an 80 mph pitch. But after a bit of practice in the cages, I can usually foul a few off — with nothing special about that. Foul balls are boring. 

So let’s put a six-pitch limit on every at-bat. As in, after six pitches, you’re either on base or automatically out.

Why This Works For Major League Baseball

It’s totally worth considering. If a guy can’t get on base after six pitches, he doesn’t deserve to get there. Now, some of you might be objecting because any decent pitcher would start every at-bat by throwing two balls. Maybe three if you’re Clayton Kershaw. C’mon now- these guys are big leaguers. Three chances to get a hit is plenty.

Once again, the result is a considerable uptick in aggressive at bats. Strikeouts go way up in this scenario. Home runs stay about the same: some nights aces will shut down offenses, others will see sluggers teeing off on middle tier pitchers forced to throw over the plate. A walk- the most mind-numbingly dull play in sports- actually becomes an exciting and gutsy play.

Let’s face it. If Abner Doubleday had had Facebook and penicillin, he would have thought of this one himself.

There’s no downside here. Also, a fun medical bonus comes with this idea. This might even actually put less mileage on those precious pitching arms. Investment protected, and inattentive fans engaged.

Moving on…

The spitting image of wisdom. (Photo by Sean M. Haffey/Getty Images)
The spitting image of wisdom. (Photo by Sean M. Haffey/Getty Images) /

Wrapping Up, Early 

With a new season of Major League Baseball looming, hopefully, this piece has inspired many of you to write your commissioner and lobby for some of these sweeping changes to be enacted.

More from Call to the Pen

But don’t feel constrained by just these five! Here are some honorable mentions to chew on while you’re sitting through that next call to the bullpen:

  • Forget a baseball diamond: can you say baseball triangle?
  • Pitcher vetoes- Once per nine innings, a team’s pitcher is allowed to pick one batter that is just out automatically. No questions asked, no time wasted.
  • Manager overrides- Imagine this. Next time Dave Roberts calls on Kenley Jansen to pitch, or Cody Bellinger to pinch hit, Bruce Bochy gets to make him choose Sergio Romo or Chase Utley instead.
  • Bring back the mercy rule. Good enough for little league, good enough for the big leagues.
  • Cut back on commercial breaks: hockey and soccer seem to be pretty popular, and they have way fewer commercials than baseball does.

Next: Will these new rule changes speed the game up?

Whoops. That last one was serious. Not sure how that slipped in there.

Happy spring training, everyone!

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